March 23, 2004 (Fundamental Baptist Information Service, P.O. Box 610368, Port Huron, MI 48061, 866-295-4143, fbns@wayoflife.org; for instructions about subscribing and unsubscribing or changing addresses, see the information paragraph at the end of the article) -

The following article examining divorce and remarriage is by Vince Londini, Associate Pastor, Bethel Baptist Church, London, Ontario, vlondini@bethelbaptist.ca --

The divorce issue can become difficult to discuss, because many people hold strong opinions that sound good, but contradict God’s Word. Such views become “quagmires,” creating entrapping positions that can never be resolved. Together we will study the Scriptures to see how we can avoid these quagmires.

DEALING WITH PRECONCEIVED IDEAS

1. “Divorce is ALWAYS wrong” or “God NEVER approves of divorce.”

The following Scriptures contradict this view:

1. God gave a law allowing and regulating the proper procedure for divorce (Deut 24:1-4).
2. God was pleased by a series of divorces (Ezra 10:10-11).
3. God Himself divorced His OT people (Jeremiah 3:8).
4. Christ granted permission to divorce if a spouse was unfaithful (Matthew 19:9).

We must harmonize all of God’s Word. We may find our opinion best expressed in one or two verses, but to know God’s opinion we must consider all of His Word. Certainly, God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16). What does He mean by that? Is He now saying He hates all divorces, even those that pleased Him in Ezra? Does God contradict Himself? No, He must mean that He hates the practice of divorcing without just grounds, as is clearly pictured by the context. [The context of Malachi 2 is when a man deals treacherously or violently against the wife of his youth (vv. 15, 16). God is saying that he hates divorce when it is in the context of this type of wickedness.]

The belief that “divorce is always wrong” leads to an interpretive quagmire that can only resolved by trying to explain away God’s clear statements.

2. “In the beginning it was not so.”

God created marriage with the intention that it would last forever (“in the beginning it [divorce] was not so”). But, the Fall into sin changed everything. God does not expect sinful humanity in a sin-cursed world to live up to the perfection established for perfect humans in a sin-free world. In His mercy, God’s Word clearly recognizes some situations where divorce is appropriate.

In Matthew 19:9, God’s words “And I say unto you” completely wipe away all considerations from the Garden and from the Law, replacing those standards with His standard for His churches. Why would Christ do that, but expect us to think that the phrase “in the beginning it was not so” (v. 8) or His statements about hard hearts somehow cancel out what He is going to say in verse 9? Beware of using one passage to cancel out another passage without a clear mandate from God’s Word to do so. “And I say unto you” is a clear mandate that cancels out everything before it, leaving us with His rule by which we are to live.

1 Corinthians 7 teaches some “things hard to be understood.” Verses 10 and 11 could be read to prohibit all divorces, while verse 15 could be seen as a second acceptable reason for a divorce, and verses 27 and 28 could be seen to permit all remarriages. However, we find no clear statement that 1 Corinthians 7 replaces or cancels out Christ’s definitive statement in the Gospels. Therefore these verses must be understood to compliment and agree with Christ’s statement, not to deny it or expand it.

Please be aware that false cults justify their belief in baptismal regeneration (Acts 2:38, Mark 16:16) or the Mass (John 6:53) and other heresies by using a few verses to reinterpret the clear statements of God’s Word. If we carefully examine “the whole counsel of God,” we will avoid this dangerous quagmire.

3. “You may have grounds for a divorce, but you can never remarry.”

Divorce and remarriage are really the same issue. Deuteronomy 24:1-4 clearly indicates that a just divorce leaves both parties free to remarry. In Matthew 19:9, our Savior said that He prohibited all divorce and remarriage, except in the case of fornication. In that phrase “Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery” he joins the putting away with the remarriage by the word “and.” He refers to the divorce/remarriage as one situation, a sinful one if just grounds do not exist for the divorce.

The right to remarry has always been included with the permission to divorce. But, some say, “they must pay a price for letting their marriage collapse!” We must not act as vigilantes, exacting a penalty from those who have sinned, by holding it over their heads, mistreating them, or looking down on them. Christ is still the head of His church, and in His pure justice, He will punish sin. Christ combined the two; to separate them is to enter an interpretive quagmire.

4. “The world’s standards have lowered because church standards have lowered.”

The unsaved world behaves the way they do because they are “children of disobedience.” Some lost souls may point to God’s people in an attempt to excuse or defend their own behavior. However, the lost will disobey and rebel against God regardless of what God’s people do. Never has a lost soul in our community of 330,000 contacted our church to consider our stand on divorce/remarriage. The lost person would rather not know what God says, for “the things of God are foolishness unto him, neither can he know them, for they are spiritually discerned.”

The Westminster Confession of 1646, Matthew Henry (1662-1714), Matthew Poole (1700s), and countless other godly expositors in the last 300 years have all understood Christ’s phrase in Matthew 19:9 as grounds for a just divorce. Matthew Henry and Matthew Poole also believed that 1 Corinthians 7:15 granted another just cause.

“No divorce, ever” is not the historical position. It is improper to claim that Christ’s exception is a “new teaching” responsible for the tide of divorces in our day. Probably, the surge of divorces in our culture results from the drug, sex, and pornography revolutions of the 60s and 70s.

Beware the temptation to establish standards as a reaction against the world. We must ground our stand in God’s Word regardless of where the world stands, lest we enter an interpretive quagmire of interpreting Scripture in light of the behavior of the lost.

5. “A belief that divorce is absolutely wrong will force a couple to stay together and work out everything, even unfaithfulness.”

The opposite situation is just as likely. What about the poor woman whose husband is a philanderer and unwilling to repent? Would God have her continue to endure the emotional wrenching of his repeated unrepentant unfaithfulness, expose herself to disease as she faithfully performs her part in their sexual relationship, trapped in her marriage by an incorrect interpretation of Scripture? Some wicked man might like that, but it creates an interpretive quagmire that defames God’s Word and Character.

6. “If sexual infidelity is grounds for divorce, lots of divorces are approved by God.”

Since the normal behavior of humans who divorce is to find another companion, many divorces may eventually be justified by Christ’s exception in Matthew 19:9. God is equal parts justice and mercy. It is entirely consistent with the mercy of God that He would grant the emotionally shredded soul whose spouse has been unfaithful or has departed for some other reason and then become unfaithful, the opportunity to end the marriage and marry someone else who will exercise love and faithfulness.

Beware of preconceived ideas. Be sure to examine all of your assumptions and thinking with the Scripture. Discard any idea, no matter how strongly you believe it, which does not align with God’s Word. The only safe ground for our thinking is God’s Word. Wherever our thinking departs from His Word, we open ourselves to attacks from Satan in which we will find ourselves unable to stand, having relied on our fallible opinion instead of His infallible Word.

PERPETUAL ADULTERY

The view that a remarried couple is “living in adultery” arises from a misinterpretation of Scripture. The argument denies that divorce can end a marriage. Usually it misuses Romans 7:3 or relies upon 1 Corinthians 7:39 to argue that only death ends a marriage. However, Deuteronomy 24 clearly indicates that divorce ends marriage. In John 4, Christ told the woman at the well “thou hast had five husbands,” carefully using the past-tense to indicate that those previous marriages were ended. Not one clear statement of Scripture teaches that marriage is a mystically eternal connection that extends even beyond a divorce.

Beware using types or Bible pictures of marriage to teach beyond what is clearly stated in Scripture. All types fall apart at some level, even the types of Christ in the OT. Arguments from types only hold true where the thing pictured is clearly stated. Believing that “since salvation never ends, marriages never end,” is stretching the type beyond the clear teaching of the Word. Conversely, believing that “since divorce ends marriage, a believer can lose his salvation” is just as fallacious. Using types to argue beyond what is clearly stated is an interpretive quagmire similar to reading the reflection of a book in a mirror.

Read Galatians 5:19-21.
“Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.”

Consider now the interpretive quagmire created by the unscriptural position that divorce does not end marriage. The phrase “they which do such things” means “they which practice (or continue doing) these things.” If we judge a remarried person to be committing adultery every time he engages in the marriage act with his new spouse, these verses deny him salvation. He is going to Hell. What if that soul was already born-again? Does he lose his salvation? How does a soul quit committing this adultery?

Does he divorce the 2nd spouse? That would be adding yet another sin to his account. Further, it is never right to do wrong. Does he quit sleeping with the new spouse? To do so means he breaks God’s instructions in 1 Corinthians 7:4-5, where we are not to cease from marital relations except for season of fasting and prayer, making sure to come together again. Is God now commanding him to sin?

[In Matthew 19, in the very context of His teaching on divorce and remarriage, the Lord Jesus Christ stated that God does not force men to be eunuchs: “For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it” (Matt. 19:12).]

Can the “perpetual adulterer” ever join a NT church? The church is clearly commanded to separate from those who continue to defy God (1 Cor. 5). Thus, this Christian, no matter how repentant, cannot fellowship with other Christians.

All of these questions arise when the true nature of marriage is misunderstood. “Perpetual adultery” is an interpretive quagmire we should avoid.

A SECOND CAUSE

Does 1 Corinthians 7:15 give a second ground for divorce that Christ did not mention? I do not believe so for the following reasons.

Christ’s statement in Matthew 19:9 appears specific and exhaustive. While the NT epistles routinely expand our understanding of doctrine from the seed in Christ’s teaching, He seemed clear and definitive on this issue. I want to avoid being either narrower or broader than God’s Word.

If the abandonment by an unbelieving spouse is grounds for divorce, we face the unenviable responsibility of determining whether the departing spouse is redeemed. Evidence can be procured to show definitively that a spouse has been unfaithful. But, what evidence will show definitively the state of a soul? Remember that Lot is called “righteous” in the NT, but given only his recorded behavior we might never have known. [And though Judas was unsaved, the disciples never suspected it and did not suspect it even when Christ identified him at the Last Supper and Judas actually got up to leave. Compare Matthew 26:21-25 and John 13:21-30.] People, even saved people, can yield to the flesh and become incredibly crosswise with God and their fellow Christians. In the heat of such sin, they may look completely unsaved.

We run the risk of having encouraged a person to sin, if the departing spouse was indeed born-again. In my mind, the “second cause” becomes an unenviable interpretive quagmire.

THE TRUE TEST OF OUR CHRISTIANITY

It has been well said that a true test of our salvation is how we respond to those who disagree with us. In this or any disagreement, may God’s Spirit so control us and show forth His love through us, that “by this shall all men know that ye are my disciples.” Keep studying His Word, doing His will, and walking with Him!