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[The following material is from O Timothy magazine, Volume 13, Issue 3, 1996. This material cannot be placed on BBS or Internet sites without express permission from the author. Any articles which are redistributed by e-mail or print must be left intact and nothing must be removed or changed, including these informational headers. Copyright 1995 by David W. Cloud. All rights are reserved by the author. O Timothy is a monthly magazine. Annual subscription is US$20 FOR THE UNITED STATES. Send to Way of Life Literature, P.O. Box 610368, Port Huron, MI 48061-0368, fbns@wayoflife.org. FOR CANADA the subscription is $20 Canadian. Send to Bethel Baptist Church, P.O. Box 9075, London, Ontario N6E 1V0. The Way of Life Internet web site is http://www.wayoflife.org .]

THE BIBLE OF RECOVERED MEMORIES

The following review is excerpted from Christian News, December 11, 1995:

The Courage to Heal--A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse (HarperCollins Publisher) first appeared in 1988. The authors are Ellen Bass and Laura Davis. The Third Edition came out in 1994.

It has been referred to as the "Bible of the Incest-Memory Recovery Movement."

Laura Davis says she is a lesbian and Ellen Bass supports lesbianism. The book repeatedly promotes lesbianism and sex outside of marriage. Christian and scriptural standards of morality are rejected.

In a chapter on "Using the Writing Exercises" the authors advise women survivors of sexual abuse to write down whatever comes to their mind about being sexually abused as children. They say,

"Participants are asked to write about being sexually abused as children. So often survivors have had their experiences denied, trivialized, or distorted. Writing is an important avenue for healing because it gives you the opportunity to define your own reality. You can say: This did happen to me. It was that bad. It was the fault and responsibility of the adult. I was--and am--innocent.

"By going back and writing about what happened, you also reexperience feelings and are able to grieve. You excavate the sites in which you've buried memory and pain, dread and fury. You relive your history" (p. 31).

"Try to forget everything you've ever been told about writing. What you're going to do is a kind of free writing, or stream-of-consciousness writing. It's not about making art or polished crafting or trying to make sense to someone else. Rather it's a way to short-circuit some of your censors to get to what you need to say.

"Write without stopping. Go at a pace that's comfortable for you, and don't stop. If you get stuck or can't think of anything to say, you can write 'This is the stupidest exercise I ever heard of,' or 'I'm hungry--I wonder if time's up yet.' One woman who was writing about her abuse stopped every few lines and wrote 'I cannot say any more,' and then went on to say more. Allowing herself to refuse to go on, saying no, made it possible for her to go one more step each time.

"You needn't use full sentences. You needn't spell or punctuate properly. It can be in English or in another language. Sometimes if another language was spoken when you were a child you will remember in that language. If you were abused before you learned to talk, your writing may come out as baby talk" (pp. 32,33).

What the "survivors" of sexual abuse writes is now supposed to be the truth.

SELF-ESTEEM

The authors write:

"This whole book is about improving your self-esteem. Whether you are contacting the child within, discovering your anger, working on sex, or grieving for your past, you will be forging a more gentle, loving relationship with yourself" (p. 189).

In an item titled "Creating a Positive Self-Image--Live for Yourself," the authors write:

"We all have the right to make choices that we believe will bring us satisfaction. We have the right to determine our own values, lifestyle, and priorities. If you are still trying to please others, if you are still hoping to form someone else's approval, then you will never be smart enough, thin enough, successful enough" (p. 194).

The authors do not believe that God in His Word has set forth His standards and commandments which man is to obey.

IMMORALITY

The authors see nothing wrong with having sex with one "lover" after another whether married or not. They write:

"The perspective on sexuality that is presented here applies to both lesbian and heterosexual women. Although there are some differences in the difficulties these groups face, they are far outweighed by the similarities. (If you're not sure about your sexual preference or want more information, see 'On Being a Lesbian and a Survivor' at the end of this chapter.)

"We use the word 'lover' in this chapter to describe any sexual partner. This includes someone you are casually dating, someone you are deeply committed or married to, and any relationship in between. Healing takes place on many levels, and whether you are celibate, dating, in a short-term relationship, or in a committed partnership, you can heal sexually" (p. 249).

ON BEING A LESBIAN AND A SURVIVOR

"Being a lesbian is a perfectly healthy way to be, not another effect of the abuse you need to overcome. One workshop participant commented wryly on this search for the pathological reasons behind lesbianism: 'If I'm a lesbian because I was abused, at least something good came out of it" (p. 278).

"Sexual orientation is a continuum. A small percentage of people are exclusively heterosexual or homosexual. Most are somewhere in the middle. ... The decision is up to you" (pp. 278,279).

"If you think you might be a lesbian but the idea scares or disturbs you, what you're feeling is natural. It's common to have doubts and questions in the coming-out process. Try reading about lesbians who are comfortable with themselves. Read coming-out stories. Talk to people you know to be unbiased, who will support you in whatever choice you make" (p. 279).

BELIEVE THE SURVIVOR

"Believe the survivor. Even if she sometimes doubts herself, even if her memories are vague, even if what she tells you sounds too extreme, believe her. Women rarely make up stories of abuse. Let her know that you are open to hearing anything she wishes to share, and that although it's painful and upsetting, you are willing to enter those difficult places with her and to receive her words with respect" (p. 332).

"According to the best measures available, as many as one in three girls and one in sex boys are sexually abused as children" (p. 497).

Bass and Davis claim, "There is no such thing as a 'false memory syndrome'" (p. 485).